It was not a bad dream after all. We kind of were hoping to "wake up" and find it's not true. Five months is a long time but for us it is just like yesterday.
The festive season lost its sparkle this time. However am trusting God to fill us with three of His fruit of the Spirit: LOVE, JOY, and PEACE.
Friday, December 30, 2011
Wednesday, September 28, 2011
TWO MONTHS ON............UNBELIEVABLE!
Well I do not expect anyone to understand the feeling of the void left by a LOVED one unless you have experience the same. Yesterday I was finally able to get the death certificate. Let me tell you, it was like I did not know all along that it was true and finally somebody is handing me the evidence in black and white.
I was wondering aloud to a friend of mine yesterday as to how long it takes to ease the pain and memory. She was like.....it depends on individuals. Maybe I loved much I don't know. But you know what, God Himself is filling that void day by day. Psalms 68:5 reminds me that He is the father of my children and my defender. Psalms 146: 9 also tells me that He is the one who sustains us.
I also thank the Almighty God for His free gift of salvation to all who ask and welcome Him into their lives. If you have not asked Jesus into your life now is the time, opportunity that you have been given. You do not know about tomorrow. Read John3:16. I have full assurance Chege is alive in the spirit and well in heaven with God Himself. That gives me a lot of peace of mind when I know that one day I will see him again, of course not as a husband anymore. In heaven we shall be like the angels of God.... Mark 12:25.
I was wondering aloud to a friend of mine yesterday as to how long it takes to ease the pain and memory. She was like.....it depends on individuals. Maybe I loved much I don't know. But you know what, God Himself is filling that void day by day. Psalms 68:5 reminds me that He is the father of my children and my defender. Psalms 146: 9 also tells me that He is the one who sustains us.
I also thank the Almighty God for His free gift of salvation to all who ask and welcome Him into their lives. If you have not asked Jesus into your life now is the time, opportunity that you have been given. You do not know about tomorrow. Read John3:16. I have full assurance Chege is alive in the spirit and well in heaven with God Himself. That gives me a lot of peace of mind when I know that one day I will see him again, of course not as a husband anymore. In heaven we shall be like the angels of God.... Mark 12:25.
Sunday, August 28, 2011
ONE MONTH ON
Today is one month on. Memories, memories............
All in all God has continued to give us His peace day by day. Today I was able to go back to church and sit through praise, worship and sermon. A few tears here and there but it was good. This was BIG for me and I was very excited. We take little things like that for granted. You only appreciate them when you cannot have them. I tried going to church two weeks ago but memories of him were everywhere and I nearly screamed in church. I had to dash out and go home.
Lets appreciate one another as much as we can all the time. I thank God that He had blessed us with a great marriage relationship. I have no worry or guilt baggage. All the same I still wish I had done more.
Lets also invite God into our lives because after all is gone, there is an eternity that awaits us and we can only make the choice of where to spend it here. Is your life "hidden in Christ in God?" - Colosians 3:1-4. Chege's life was hidden in Christ in God. We only buried his body which was his earthly suit but right now he is well and with Jesus. One day those of us who know the Lord will meet again with him, either when we also die or when the Lord comes back for us in the air - whichever comes first. 1Thessalonians 4:16 - "For the Lord himself will come down from heaven, with a loud command, with the voice of the archangel and with the trumpet call of God and the dead in Christ will rise first".
All in all God has continued to give us His peace day by day. Today I was able to go back to church and sit through praise, worship and sermon. A few tears here and there but it was good. This was BIG for me and I was very excited. We take little things like that for granted. You only appreciate them when you cannot have them. I tried going to church two weeks ago but memories of him were everywhere and I nearly screamed in church. I had to dash out and go home.
Lets appreciate one another as much as we can all the time. I thank God that He had blessed us with a great marriage relationship. I have no worry or guilt baggage. All the same I still wish I had done more.
Lets also invite God into our lives because after all is gone, there is an eternity that awaits us and we can only make the choice of where to spend it here. Is your life "hidden in Christ in God?" - Colosians 3:1-4. Chege's life was hidden in Christ in God. We only buried his body which was his earthly suit but right now he is well and with Jesus. One day those of us who know the Lord will meet again with him, either when we also die or when the Lord comes back for us in the air - whichever comes first. 1Thessalonians 4:16 - "For the Lord himself will come down from heaven, with a loud command, with the voice of the archangel and with the trumpet call of God and the dead in Christ will rise first".
Friday, August 19, 2011
BABY STEPS........... ON A NEW ROAD
Today is three weeks since Jonathan went home to be with our Lord Jesus Christ. We shared almost 28years together - long enough and so tight that the ability to think in singular was erased from my database. I am taking baby steps to learn "singular"all over again and this time for good.
The other day I boiled one egg and it opened a floodgate of emotion - I always did two. Our children like fried egg. I walked down a street yesterday and felt very lonely. In fact an ugly thought crossed my mind that I am a wounded soldier, and I even started wondering what they do in the army with wounded soldiers. The Holy Spirit helped me remember the time our Lord Jesus went through the the Temptation. He was both hungry and emotionally and physically exhausted, but not wounded. When the devil left Him, we are told angels came and ministered to Him. I realized that is what I needed. I asked the Lord to send His angels to minister to me and within a few minutes I felt better.
To help with the healing I am reading a book by Max Lucado - Travelling Light about releasing those burdens which we are not meant to bear because Jesus is willing to lift them from off us. This book was lovingly and thoughtfully given to me that first week by some wonderful brethren from our church.
The other day I boiled one egg and it opened a floodgate of emotion - I always did two. Our children like fried egg. I walked down a street yesterday and felt very lonely. In fact an ugly thought crossed my mind that I am a wounded soldier, and I even started wondering what they do in the army with wounded soldiers. The Holy Spirit helped me remember the time our Lord Jesus went through the the Temptation. He was both hungry and emotionally and physically exhausted, but not wounded. When the devil left Him, we are told angels came and ministered to Him. I realized that is what I needed. I asked the Lord to send His angels to minister to me and within a few minutes I felt better.
To help with the healing I am reading a book by Max Lucado - Travelling Light about releasing those burdens which we are not meant to bear because Jesus is willing to lift them from off us. This book was lovingly and thoughtfully given to me that first week by some wonderful brethren from our church.
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